I wasn't paying complete attention, but I think I got some of the main points.
Don't punch a bear in the nose.
You can't outrun a shark.
Don't suck the venom out of a rattlers head.
Only drink water out of a fish head barrel.
Don't go anywhere a helicopter can't.
Don't drink boiling water.
Don't drink boiling snow.
Only drink alcohol if you're trying to get someone hot.
Don't swim upstream in the ocean.
Never use a tourniquet to remove a limb a knife is stuck in.
Bad things happen when you leave your couch.
OK, I'm good to go